My Girl
by Harmlessly Weird
Summary: I wondered about Haymitch's "girl" after he mentioned what he did with the force field and the repercussions on her. Haymitch's last moments with his girlfriend, and first moments with a bottle. Apologies for lack of convincing lovey-dovey descriptions.


**Redone :) Thanks for the reviews.**

"Hey," she says softly. I jump. Sperra laughs quietly and sits down next to me. She puts a cup of hot milk in my hand. She's the Goat Man's much sweeter and cleaner daughter, and always has plenty of milk. I don't have the heart to tell her that we have much more at home.

"Hey," I say.

She smiles. Then she clears her throat, glances at the ground, and says awkwardly, "I'm glad you made it out."

Sperra doesn't know about the plagues of nightmares that linger in my head even when I'm awake. Sperra doesn't know what it's like to kill.

"It's…still bad," I say haltingly.

She blinks. "What?"

"The arena. It's like…like I'm still there."

She frowns, and that cute little crease appears between her eyebrows the way it does when she's puzzled. "Haymitch, you're out of the arena. You're never going back. There's not even the_slightest_chance you're going back. _Ever_."

"I didn't mean like that. I know that. Never ever going back, no chance of going back. I just can't get it out of my head. It's only been two weeks, Sperra. I have nightmares. I wake up screaming. And…"

I hesitate. Telling Sperra about what the Capitol thinks of me will put her in danger. Extreme danger. I can't tell her they've gotten my brother already. I can't tell her that I'm so frightened for _her_.

"What was that girl's name, in the arena?" she says, trying to change the subject quickly. But it's not just that. She sounds almost jealous.

"Maysilee," I say. "Donner."

"Oh," Sperra says. "I see."

"There was nothing between us," I say quickly. "We were just both from Twelve. And you never really abandon anyone you've made an alliance with." I was worried that Sperra would think that. But I'm telling her the truth. Maysilee had no one else; how could I have abandoned her when she was dying?

Sperra relaxes fractionally. "Okay." She takes a sip of milk. "You know, Haymitch, I was thinking. About the force field. Was that even allowed?"

I swear internally. She's too curious. I fight to keep my voice from shaking as I say, "You know there are pretty much no written rules."

"Don't eat one another and don't step off your plate for a minute. There's only one winner," she counters. "Sound like rules to me."

"True," I concede. "But –"

"Mr. Abernathy?"

I whirl. The Head Peacekeeper, Aeneas, leers at me and says, "Who's this?"

"My girlfriend," I say defensively. "Sperra Allgood." It feels good to be able to call her my girlfriend. I've never done that before.

"Hi," Sperra says nervously.

"Mr. Abernathy, what were you about to say to Miss Allgood?"

"About to say?"

"Why are you meeting at the edge of the Meadow, Mr. Abernathy? Is there something wrong with public?"

"Ah – no. Sperra and I met each other here. It has sentimental meaning."

I pride myself in lying. I made Sperra meet me here because it's out of the way, and I can tell her stuff.

"Sentimental meaning." Aeneas's lip curls. "I see."

He turns to Sperra and says, "Miss Allgood, would you come with me?"

She blinks. "Why, sir?"

"We have our reasons," Aeneas says. "You won't be seeing Mr. Abernathy again today." I can almost hear him adding _And on any other day, for that matter_.

He grabs her roughly, drawing a "Hey!" from both of us.

"Let her go," I insist, pushing at him. "Let her go!"

She still looks almost blankly confused, like she doesn't know what's going on. Which, if you think about it, she probably doesn't.

"Will that be all, Mr. Abernathy?" Aeneas says, his lip curling again. "Your _girlfriend_ is coming with me. Let's go, Allgood."

I draw back a fist and punch his face. Hard. Hopefully I've knocked out a tooth…

No such luck. Aeneas roars, all disgustingly yellow teeth present and accounted for. He lets go of Sperra and advances on me.

She glances at me fearfully. "Haymitch, what's going on?"

Aeneas's hand flies out, cracking across my face even harder than my drunken dad's did. "Do you know who I _am_, boy?"

"Do you know who _I_ am? Victor of the Fiftieth Hunger Games?" I counter.

He grabs Sperra again and turns to me. "You'll be sorry, boy. Right now." And then five more Peacekeepers appear and pin my arms behind my back and keep me down while Aeneas drags a screaming Sperra away.

I kick and spit at the Peacekeepers, but five trained adults against one crazed victor fresh out of the arena is an unfair match. Still, I take every chance to bite a finger.

Finally, one of the more lenient Peacekeepers, Cray, tells the rest to let me go. His actual words are "He'll figure out that he can't mess with us soon enough". The Peacekeepers drop me as one and then march off, leaving a highly bruised Haymitch Abernathy on the ground.

I consider Sperra for a split second. Could I possibly get to the squad in time? My terrified emotional side tells me yes, but my colder rational side tells me no.

My rational side is what got me out of the Hunger Games alive. I walk home and unlock my empty Victors' Village house. I live alone now – my family was killed by firing squad already, for my force field stunt. Sperra was all I had left. And now…

I hear a scream in the night, and then the sound of gunshots.

My girl is gone.

An animal wail escapes me, and I run out of the house. This is how Dad coped with stuff – with the stress of being a mine worker.

I run to the wine seller's daughter, Ripper, and pay her for three bottles of white liquor.


End file.
